One of the three goals of Peace Corps is "to help promote a better understanding of the American people on the part of the peoples served" so although these questions make me laugh to myself, I can consider it work (volunteer work that is) when I am answering them.
9. Are you married?
In Malawi if you're not married by your mid-twenties you're probably either a social outcast or someone that's well off enough not to have to worry about the backward, outdated social customs that we have here. Most people, again especially those in rural areas, especially girls, are in a hurry to get married well before they turn 20. I don't want to go off on a rant here about early marriage and all that, but let's just say that there is an ocean between the marriage customs in America and Malawi. I'm in my mid-twenties, and some might say that I look a bit older because of my red goatee and mature demeanor (LOL). It follows that many people here can't wrap their heads around the fact that I'm a (fairly) normal young man with no wife. I typically receive advice that I need to marry here and buy lots of farmland. As tempting as that may seem, I think I need to move on with my life, outside of Malawi (January's right around the corner!).
8. When you go back home to America will you take me with you?
I usually answer yes (if I have the time and energy to bs), and then go on to tell them they're more than welcome to come along with me when I go home if they can find a passport and enough money for a plane ticket. Someone once proposed that I could smuggle them in my suitcase, and this may also be a viable option.
7. Do you know (insert name of some obscure preacher from the West that "evangelizes" in Malawi)?
My answer is usually just "no" followed by the silent treatment, but sometimes I want to go off on a rant about how out of whack with reality some of this stuff is. People here go crazy over religion! I won't make any moral judgments and say whether or not this is good for this already ultra-superstitious and logic-lite society, but I must say that I have a hard time sharing everyone's enthusiasm for "Ambuye!!!" I don't want to beat this topic to death, but here are three quick points about why religion in Malawi, in particular the denominations which act like the super zealous cousins of the Southern Baptism we have in the States, don't jive with the way I see the world: 1) If the church doesn't have enough chairs/benches, then all the "Christian" men are provided with a decent place to sit before almost any women are. 2) Night Prayers. "I know what we can do for fun this weekend! Let's spend all of our hard-earned (yet still sparse) cash on a huge stereo system so we can stay up all night yelling at Jesus with our gospel music blaring and the entire neighborhood unable to sleep!" Praise the Lord for giving me the wisdom to buy a decent set of earplugs a few months ago. 3) Speaking is Tongues. I'd only seen glimpses of this on TV back in the States, but I encounter this all the time here. I don't really see how regularly and frequently yelling nonsense fits into the values Jesus taught of compassion and thoughtfulness. In a place where witchcraft is so taboo and feared I find it ironic that this type of "prayer" is so popular.
6. Who taught you to speak Chichewa?
I'm asked this as if I have had one teacher that I meet with every day, but that hasn't been the case. After three years here, I'm fairly competent with this language. I've found that the best way (at least for me) to learn a new language is to constantly put myself out there, talking with people, making mistakes, and then learning from the mistakes. I'm laughed at on a daily basis (think about how foreigners trying to learn English are treated in the States by the general public-the same kind of thing happens here), and it would have been a lot easier to not put any effort towards learning this language that is of little use beyond Malawi's boarders and that I'll completely forget a few years from now.
5. How have you seen Malawi? (Translated to normal English: What do you think of Malawi?)
This very open-ended question always seems to be asked to me when I have a lot to say, can't think of where to start, and have little patience to talk with anyone. I usually explain that "Malawi is a good place with good people, but there is lot's of poverty here." This very simple and obvious answer is usually replied by an agreeable sigh and contentment. We can then move onto a more interesting topic of conversation like "When will the rains start this year?" Most people here (in general and relatively speaking), are very welcoming to outsiders. They're also very self conscious and curious people. They want to know about the outside world, but they are also interested to hear about how the outside world views them. This is something we don't really do in the States. We may be fairly up to speed with what's going on beyond our boarders, but we also kind of do our own thing and don't give a rip about how our actions affect peoples' perception (be it positive or negative) of our country.
4. What is the staple food in your country?
Malawians take pride in the fact that their staple food is maize, and they seem to think that every county has one particular food that they depend on for most of their calories. Obviously, this isn't the case in the States-which makes this question difficult to answer directly. I usually tell people that 1) The United States is a very big country with many different climates and therefore many different crops being cultivated and 2) We have many different cultures mixed together that have brought many different foods to the melting pot that is the United States. I enjoy telling people about the fact that there are people from all over the world in the US. At least during the past century, this has been one of our biggest strengths: diversity and a certain amount of tolerance for it.
3. What is your favorite food?
It would be easy and honest to say that my favorite food is pizza (with a cold beer...Oh my God that sounds good...I can't wait until January), but most people here wouldn't really understand what I'm talking about. So instead I usually tell people that my favorite food is nsima with roasted fish and pumpkin leaves with groundnut flour. But this is only halfway true because that meal is my favorite Malawian foods, but certainly it does not even come close to my favorite food which would most definitely be pizza, as I mentioned earlier. To be honest, Malawian food sucks. It's very plain and uninteresting. It must be the British influence. Did I mention that I can't wait to get home and eat good pizza? Mmmmm, a cheeseburger will be good as well.
2. Is it true that in the United States students only learn one subject?
People here tend to think (for whatever reason) that from high school onwards, American students specialize in one area only (eg. Mathematics). I can see that some of the confusion might come from the idea of having a "major" in college, but I really have no idea where this huge misconception comes from. My answer is: "No, that is completely ridiculous."
1. Can you give me some money?
I've beat the topic of begging and how much it annoys me to death many other times on this blog. Please refer to those previous posts for elaboration.
"You can't connect the dots looking forward you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something: your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. Because believing that the dots will connect down the road will give you the confidence to follow you heart, even when it leads you off the well-worn path." Steve Jobs
